Thoughts for Thursday

I've seen a couple shows about the new group of employees entering the work force for the first time. What bothers me is that they expect their bosses and others to let them come in late, wear what they want - they expect praise and rewards and you aren't allowed to tell them when they are doing something wrong. I don't get this - I'm not that much older than these people - by just a few years (5 or so years). I was trained to come in when your are assigned to come in, follow the rules, accept criticism and do what I need to do to correct any problems. Call me crazy - but isn't this how it is supposed to be?

Sure, I would love to be able to come into work in my pj's, listen to my ipod, and do what I want when I want - and expect to get paid not only monetarily, but also with prizes - like a new ipod or a wii.

They talked about the reason for this - every child, they say, expects a trophy and only words of encouragement. They say that adults are building this society...not this adult.

I don't expect Jenna's teachers to only say positive things to her, I want her to learn and grow - to become a responsible adult (not that I'm looking forward for her to grow up).

I have taken classes in communication techniques in the workplace - and yes, when I started working 10 years ago - things had changed from the time when my parents started working, but there has to be a stop or the American economy, in my opinion, will continue to fail.

What do you think? Are children being babied too much? Would you only want your child to be praised and rewards?

Thoughts for Thursday

I don't really have any deep thoughts today, but I do have a lot of friends who don't know the full extend of what is going on in my family's life right now - so I am going to talk about that instead.

Many of you know about my niece, Alia, and all of her medical problems. She was released from the hospital earlier this week, only to have to return again last night. She has a very fast moving "cousin" of tuberculosis growing inside what is left of her left lung. Today she is going to have surgery to have a port put in where they can directly administer antibiotics and draw blood. They are hoping this will help and will make it so that they will not have to remove the remainder of her left lung. The incision from the surgery over a month ago reopened and the doctors have called it "interesting" and "amazing" - coming from dr's who have people coming from across the US for their help, it's not quite what you want to hear.

Poor Landon, Alia's 8 year old brother, gets shuttled back and forth from grandma's, aunts, neighbors as Suzanne, my sister is living in a 1979 winnebago in the parking lot of the hospital. My brother-in-law tries to divide his time between Landon, the hospital, and work. Thankfully the hospital is only about a 40 min drive away.

Needless to say, it's been quite hard on our whole family.

Then, about the same time as Alia's major surgery (a little over a month ago) - my cousin was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. Unfortunately, the cancer has spread throughout his body and they are treating him as much as they can but of course, that's a lot of setbacks. His blood sugar went screwy and he was hospitalized for that. Now, my cousin is about 15 years older than me, and he's always been so good to me. He let me borrow his car when I was still in HS so that we could get up on base to go shopping. He's always a happy cheerful guy.

My dad is also going to be going in for neck surgery this summer because of an accident that happened over 20 years ago. He's had different surgeries to help as things come up, and this one is no exception. He keeps losing feeling because his nerves get pinched and other times he hurts so bad.

If I could only stay in a little bubble that only included Jason, Jenna and I - life would be great. But, I would miss out on all of my family. We are close knit and love each other so much. When one family member hurts, we all do. I am truly thankful for the family I have - with all the chaos that it brings and wouldn't change our relationships.

The question has been asked - how much can 1 family take - I guess the only answer comes from the scriptures where it says that our Heavenly Father will only give us as much as we can handle. Guess He has more faith in us than we do of ourselves.

Thank you for all your kind words and support - it means the world to me and to my family.

My preschool graduation

I can't believe Jenna is now a preschool graduate! I'm not one of those crying moms, but seriously, I was almost in tears. Here are some pictures from graduation. The one of her on the playground is of her and her boyfriend, Davis. She said that he would run away if she went by him. She cracks me up

Taking it from her daddy

now where do you suppose Jenna got this artistic side from?

yet another blog quiz

You Are Pocahantas!

Free-spirited and wise. You have a strong passionate spirit that touches and changes all who know you. The wisdom and common sense that you have is really what guides you through life. Even so, you also have a very playful side that loves adventure and excitement.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

my name

What Michelle Means

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated. You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want. You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way! You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

I'd say for me it's 75% accurate

Jenna says....

ok, here are some of my favorite things Jenna has said recently.

"mom, I drew you a picture. It's on the TV in the dust"

"did you ask to work there (New York and Company) or did they say that you looked pretty and they wanted you to work there?"

"Just be patient" said in her most stern voice.

I love my little girl - she brings me such happiness and reminds me what life is really about.

My future unfolding!!!

I have officially been hired at my current elementary school as a 5th grade teacher next year!!! I am so excited!

Thoughts for Thursday - insurance companies

It's Thursday, right? I'm so confused on my days right now...yeah, I'm pretty sure I have tomorrow off from school - so that would mean today is Thursday. OK.

Guess what? My ditziness is directly related to my TfT today - I have been playing, "yes I do need my medication" with the insurance over the past 3 weeks. They for some odd reason feel that heart palpitations, shortness of breath, and blacking out is not a good enough reason for me to switch medicines. There are only 2 medicines on the market that can deal with depression and also work as a pain reliever. Option 1 - the cheaper one - has caused all of the above symptoms. I tried it, but I just don't want to black out while I'm driving or to have a heart attack. Call me weird.
So, option #2 is the other choice and I got some samples from the dr while they got the preapproval for the medication. I was denied - they say that I should be on option #1. In the meantime I have run out of samples and my whole body is reacting. I'm sick, can't think, getting migraines. Good ole withdrawal. I did get another month's worth of samples picked up today...but here's my question....shouldn't doctors get to say what is best for their patients, they are the ones that see the tests, sit down and talk with the patients, etc.

I understand the insurance is there to make money, they are a business - but at what expense? I'm not at a life or death point here, but it is a matter of a good quality of life. I believe that doctors should have the say. I understand that insurance companies need to ask questions, but when the pharmacy says, oh this insurance pretty much denies all medicine at first. That concerns me. They are making money at the expense of peoples health. They would rather treat a heart attack than to treat the precursers. They will put a pregnant woman on bedrest, but will not pay for disability if the baby ends up going full-term, only if the baby still comes early.

Do I make sense? If not, I guess there is just one more casualty in my war on the health insurance company.

9 years, 4 months, 13 days.

Nine years ago today I married my soul mate. Yes, 9 years ago! I can't believe it's been that long. I thought I would share our story with all of you out there who may not know it...

I moved home from college after Fall semester 1998. I had been praying and felt that even though I hadn't quite finished my associates I needed to move home. I had many different reasons as to why I thought I was being prompted to move home, but none of them included Jason. In fact, I didn't even know Jason.

I didn't want to go back to my regular ward and found that a returned missionary I really liked was going to a singles ward. So, I went there. Jason says he came up and introduced himself the first time I was there - I don't remember that. Sorry, but he didn't make any kind of impression on me - and really, I was there to follow the returned missionary. I didn't need a guy, right?

On December 31st I received a phone call, a guy named Jason was wanting me to go on a date with him. I've been taught by my oldest sister that free food is free food, so go and enjoy it even if you don't end up liking the guy. He had left me a message saying he met me in the singles ward and since he worked with the records he got my phone number. I asked my sister if she knew who he was, since he graduated the same year she did. She said she didn't know him that well, but knew he was a good guy. Apparently he was really close friends with our next door neighbor. So, I called him back and said yes.

We went on our first date on January 1, 1999. When he came to pick me up he had a bouquet of wild flowers - not roses. So right there, I was impressed. He later told me his mom always told them to take flowers to their dates on their first date. Good thinking mom! We went to Hard Rock - my first time ever. I don't remember what I ate, but I do remember what I wore. I still have the fleece sweater - wish I still fit in the pants. After we went mini golfing and talked about Murphy's law. We talked about how we were both believers in it. Odd, I know - but hey.

After the date I knew I liked him, and he was cute - but there weren't any "love" feelings. He asked me out again and we went and rented movies to watch at his house. We had digiorno pizza - another first for me (how sheltered am I?). I remember when we were renting the movies we ran into someone he knew - a girl - and he introduced me. We also held hands for the first time that night too.

between a few days of talking on the phone and him coming over one night to share poetry, I fell in love. Seems like a long time, but in all actuality, it was only about a week since our first date. He invited me to come to his house while his brother was having a b-day party - I said sure. I was friends with a lot of his brother's friends. I also found out that Jason gave the best bear hugs in the history of man kind.

We talked about marriage and decided to pray about it. We both got the same answer, but I told him to wait until my parents got back from a cruise they had been planning. Especially since we'd only known each other a week.

We started taking a religion class together at the local University and the first night we went early and walked around campus and talked. Then as he was driving over to the class he stopped at a parking lot that over looks the Ogden valley - there he proposed. He had flowers in the backseat the whole time and I didn't know it! This was January 13th. Do the math - 13 days is all!

After class we went to our ward skating party where we told a couple people, before we knew it it was announced over the loud speaker - so we had to book it home before someone called my parents.

I woke up my mom and dad while Jason was downstairs and told them the news. They acted happy for me, but I could tell they were concerned, afterall I had only known the guy for 13 days. They came downstairs and I went up stairs to tell Crystal, who had become my best friend since I had been home. She screamed, "no, you can't marry him" of course Jason heard this. I also told my little brother, who said, "what about Nick?" (the missionary I had send off a few months earlier). Yeah, my family was pretty funny about it.

I'm sure my dad did a background check and I'm guessing Jason passed. My parents did have some sit down talks with me about if I was sure he was the one, I know they were worried, but it sure annoyed me then.

4 months and 13 days after we first met we were married for time and all eternity in the Bountiful Temple. It hasn't been the easiest 9 years, but we have worked together and he has been so understanding of all my medical issues and schooling. I love him with all of my heart and can't imagine life without him. He has given me such strength and hope. He is my best friend.

I love you Jason and always will. I'm glad you agreed that I could keep you forever.

What good is a college degree when you can't pick out the right shoes?

I think somewhere along the line there should be a course required for all men and women about appropriate wear for all types of jobs. Sure, I learned what to wear to interviews and what is considered professional attire, but whatever happened to the real-lief lessons such as "shoes you should wear for your first day of standing and walking around up for 8 hours straight"
Either I missed this class - totally possible since I did miss some class, ok a lot - or they never taught it. I tend to think they never taught it.
OK, now rewind to Saturday morning. I have 3 outfits layed out on my bed. What outfit shall I wear for my first real day at my new job? I have some cute business-looking type shorts with a nice white top - something I could wear some reasonable shoes with, some pants with a nice button up shirt - again something I could wear good shoes with. Or wait, I have an idea - I have a cute dress that if I put a white shirt under it I can wear these:



yup, you guessed it - know what won? The cute outfit with the way cute shoes. I wanna look cute for my first day at work. What's the worst that could happen? Again, had I had the above mentioned class, I would've known. I was taught crisis management, not how to avert a crisis.

Walking into the mall I get the first sign that I look cute and therefore chose the right outfit. A car of teenage boys drives by and they whistle at me!!! Wahoo!

I get in and I'm assigned to the dressing room and I'm thankful, I can check out the clothes and I can handle it.

Well, by hour 4 my feet are asking my brain what it was thinking and why brain didn't ask feet about this grand idea. Of course brain was trying to ignore feet. So, feet decided if brain wasn't going to listen they may as well go numb. Well, actually only toes decided to go numb.

Fast forward to today - almost 4 days later - toes are still on strike and have yet to communicate with brain that they are still attached.

And the moral to this story...I don't have one because I figure now that feet are going to be used to said shoes and I will probably wear them again - because hey I got a whistle from some teenage boys.

For Misty - my favorite cat lover

I think most know how I feel about cats, not my favorite animal. This cracks me up and if it didn't cost $15 I would so get one for Misty. Since I know you all need a laugh, here you go.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4xntzFMzzE

Thoughts for Thursday

ok, my thoughts this Thursday are about stealing from work.

I started a new job today and my favorite clothing store, New York and Company. Most my close friends know that when I get a new outfit, that's where I got it from. They usually just assume that's where I got anything from. So, part of training today was about employee theft and it got me thinking...why would you want to steal and why would you want to steal from the place that is paying your bills?

I've never gotten this. In the name of full disclosure, I have stolen once in my life, but it was an accident and I still feel guilty. I was in elementary school and we had a gas station by us named Big Verns. I walked there one day and picked out my dollar's worth of candy, but then I couldn't find where I put some of it, so I figured I put it down and got some more. Later that day my mom and I were at KMart (you know I feel guilty because I still remember this 20 years later), I reached into my jacket pocket and low and behold, there was the air head that I thought I had put back. When the store closed a few years later, I swore that it was because I accidently stole that 10 cent piece of candy.

OK, now I get back to my point - why do some people ruin it for everyone? I understand why I have to have everything checked at the front of the store whenever I get ready to leave - because someone ruined it for everyone else. Where are the values of these people who think it's ok to steal for one reason or another. I don't see how someone can say that they deserve what they stole.

So, here's the question - if you knew that you could steal anything from work and know you wouldn't be caught, would you?

got the proverbial gun out to be polished

No, we don't own a real gun in the house, but even with Jenna only being 5, I think Jason is seriously considering getting one for when she starts to date. This was Jenna's conversation last night with her Grandma Mary. Names have been changed to protect the innocent little boys involoved. I only heard one side of the conversation since she was on the phone.

Grandma, Matt kissed me today....YES, on the lips (she says in her most exhasperated, annoyed voice). I thought he liked Jayci, but then he kissed ME. I don't know why. I guess he likes me. No, Davis is my boyfriend, not Matt. No, he didn't get mad. I said (she's sounding annoyed) I thought he liked Jayci and Jayci is my friend.

So, there you have it, you would think listening to her she was going through the problems of the teenage years, but no, this child does not believe that boys have cooties. She doesn't know where babies come from, but she has apparently had 2. (I must admit she looks really good for a 5 year old who just gave birth to 2 babies). It's only going to be a matter of time before she's playing kissing tag with all the boys and running slow so that they catch up to her. (I don't have an idea where she gets this from).

When I told Jason last night he just laughed, but I could tell, he was nervous about what's going to happen 10 years from now. She's a diva already and she's proud of it.

Our adventurous day!

Wow! I scheduled a day off and well, I still spent half a day at school. I'm in charge of a really cool thing that's going to take place at my school tomorrow. It's called the junior engineering fair and it's a whole day of hand's on projects for the entire school! Last night I had to come in and make sure that the modules arrived and delivered them to the teacher's classrooms. Today, I wanted to go in to make sure that the teachers checked their boxes before Monday morning in case there was anything missing. I also wanted to watch the 6th graders do their Olympics.
So, since I didn't want to pay for day care, I took Jenna with me. She loves going to school and loves my students (and my students love her). We watched the Olympics for a while and then the students went in for lunch. I ate my first school lunch in over 10 years today! It was a chicken sandwich, Trix yogurt, a half an apple, french fries....and kiwi! (oh and of course a chocolate milk). It wasn't too bad. Jenna thought it was cool to get to eat in the cafeteria and the 5th grade students I sat by were so excited that I was going to sit by them for lunch (I love the rewards of being a teacher - especially since right now I'm one of the cool teachers).
After we ate, Jenna went out and played with one of my 5th grade students (one of my favorite students), Elizabeth. They went down the slide so many times and just had fun on the big toy. Jenna was so sad when the bell rang and Elizabeth had to go back to class.

After the adventure at school, we ran home and I took a quick shower. Then, off we went again. I dropped Jenna off at daycare so that she could play with a friend that only comes on Fridays and I had a job interview at my all time favorite store - New York and Company. . I really liked the manager that interviewed me, it didn't really feel like an interview. I'm just looking for a PT job, especially since I won't be working for the school during the summer - we need the income. The manager said I should hear from her today or tomorrow - she just needed to contact my references.

I ran home to change out of the interview clothes and checked the mail and guess what was in there....I was approved for the Alternate Routes to Licensure program!!! What does this mean? You ask...well, in short - I can start working as a full-time teacher in the fall! I just have to take about 6 classes in the next 3 years to get my official teaching license!!! I'm so excited. I now have to send the approval to my school district and then they will interview me to make sure I'll be good (ummmm, they already hired me to be a part-time teacher, so I hope I'm good enough). Then my principal can actually offer me a position. I already talked to him about it - and he couldn't guarantee a spot for me, but I know that there are a lot of teachers leaving this year for different reasons.

So, I quickly called a couple people to share in my excitement and then went and picked up Jenna from daycare. I watched the daycare kids for a few minutes while the babysitter (the best babysitter in the world) ran next door to do something. Then I took Jenna to register for kindergarten. My baby is going to be in kindergarten! So weird.

Well, I believe that is all!
Have a great weekend!

Alia is having a good day!

I figured instead of trying to email my friends Alia's updates, I would just post them here.

April 11, 2008 at 01:29 PM MDT
Alia has had a good day. She has been in pretty good spirits and playing this morning. She is now down for a nap (hopefully we can get her schedule turned around). They are still doing some different tests to try and figure out her lung status. We are letting her rest but she will need to be poked to have some blood drawn when she wakes up. She HATES this!! It takes 3-4 people to get blood out of her.

We were able to pull one of her chest tubes. Hopefully this will help with her comfort level. She hasn't wanted to put on her duck mask this morning so we will try again later when Jared gets here.

Thank you all!

I want to publicly thank everyone who has been keeping me and my family in their prayers and sending good thoughts our way. Alia's surgery went well, but she still has the long recovery ahead. She's been very uncomfortable and has had trouble sleeping.

Thoughts for Thursday- trials

I've always believed that our Heavenly Father knows where are weaknesses and strengths are and He tries us to where he sees we need improvement, but also keeping in mind of where our strengths are. I believe there are 3 types of trials: physical, mental, and spiritual. For me, I've always been strong spiritually, but physically my body is a mess and mentally - I have clinical depression. So, Heavenly Father knows that I can rely on my spiritual strength when trials come that are mental or physical.
With all the trials going on in my family's life, I am so thankful that we are spiritually strong. That peace and comfort helps when nothing else can.

Now, I believe that our strengths and weaknesses can change throughout life. And you grow and at sometimes may be strong in all 3 areas, while other times you feel that you are failing in all 3.

What do you think are your strength and weaknesses are?

Dating and Texting

oh yes, my little Jenna is texting her boyfriend, Davis, right now to see if he wants to go on a date tonight. Yup, she has her princess play cell phone and is quite upset that he isn't answering.
So, I have a talk with her about how she doesn't get to go on a date with anyone but mommy and daddy until she is 16. In her words, "Oh man"
I am in so much trouble with this little princess. She knows too much already and she was quite upset when she lost her cell phone.
What happened to my baby?

Thoughts for Thursday

How thankful are you for being home? What is home to you?

I ask this question because with my niece being in the hospital so much over the past few months she really appreciates being in her own bed and in her home. It's not the things that my sister and brother-in-law buy that make it a home, but the feelings that are there. Alia is allowed to roam free and not be in a sterile environment. One time when they were leaving the hospital, as the wind hit her face, Alia leaned back and put her arms straight out as if to say, "I'm free".

I love my house, it is my home; but for some reason, I love being at my parents house. I love to sit there and just be with them. Especially on nights when Jason isn't home. There's something about watching TV with my parents or reading the newspaper - anything in their home. I wonder if Jenna feels that way about our home. Is there just something about it that makes it comfortable?

Am I just completely rambling? Probably - but I hope that you understand what I mean. What makes a home and home? Where are you most comfortable? Are you truly grateful for your home?