my next house will be a rambler

In one weeks time two separate set of stairs have attacked me. yes, both times I was holding onto the railing I've learned that it hurts less if you attempt to pull the railing down with you.
My mom suggests I scoot up and down the stairs on my butt.

For all of you

I love my job!!!

Yes, it is the week before Christmas break. And yes, I did have to threaten my students today with extra work. But, I can honestly say that I still love my job! My kids are so awesome and they make me smile everyday. I love to see them when they really want to succeed and they are so proud to show me their scores when they do well on the computer math and reading. I love seeing at one moment how grown up they can be and when the recess bell rings they are out on the snow pile playing king of the mountain. I can see some of myself at that age in everyone of them.

On Monday I was having a really bad day. I was stressed, my kids were out of control and I was so overwhelmed. I called my mentor and she brought me the simplest thing...6 Dove chocolates!!! It made such a difference. Even on that horrible day though, I knew I still finally chose the right profession.

Another thing that makes me smile is when I'm walking down the hall and so many children know me and will call me out by name and want to give me a hug.

Even though I am excited for 2 weeks off, I am going to miss them.

In the spirit of me being goofy...

I'm doing my first ever blog contest. The first person who can tell me how many surgeries I've had will get a prize from me. We were talking about this last night and my brother-in-law told me I've taken all the good excuses for not going to certain family functions. So, it got me thinking...how many surgeries have I really had in my life?

So, go ahead and guess while I try to remember. I'll keep this open until after Christmas

Christmas last year

I wanted to share with you all again how gorgeous Jenna is and what a wonderful photographer Jason is. This picture was taken last year for our Christmas card. Jason took Jenna out to the Great Salt Lake shores. It was freezing outside and about every 3 or 4 minutes Jason would put Jenna in the car to warm up for a minute. She was such a sport. You can't even tell that she was cold. You can see the snow on the ground, that kind of gives you an idea.

Anyway, I love this picture. Jason entered it into a contest online with Circuit City and he won 3rd place with this awesome picture. He didn't photoshop it at all. He did digitally develop it using Lightroom - that will mean something to you photo people out there.

The reason for the season

I almost teared up today as Jenna and I were driving to dance. She was telling me that her two friends were telling her that Christmas was all about presents. A normal 4 and 7 year old response, in my opinion. This is wear the proud mama moment comes in. She said, "but mom, Christmas really isn't about presents, it's all about Jesus, isn't it?"

I hope she always remembers this. Jesus is the reason for the Christmas season. What a wonderful example she is to me. She reminded me what I really should be thinking about.

ok, I'm going to admit it...

I bought the new Miley Cyrus CD for me, not Jenna. And I'm not ashamed to say right now I am rocking out to it. It's actually pretty good.

A really grateful thanks

To my cyber-friend, Kristi, for this awesome header for my blog! You rock! Thank you so much

Notice Anything Different?

Little Miss Jenna lost her first tooth today!!!

Here's the story I just found out...
I asked Jenna where her tooth was and she said that it was in the office (at school) and that she was going to go on a tooth hunt tomorrow. I thought, that's cute, her teacher does a tooth hunt when a kid loses their first tooth. So, I went to my mom's - who is the school secretary - figured she would know about this. My mom had no idea, and Jenna sees her before she leaves from school.
So, we start asking questions. Apparently Jenna lost her tooth right when the bell rang in the AM - she was with my mom in the office. So, instead of telling g-ma Mary that her tooth fell on the floor and ask G-ma to help find it she runs to class without telling anyone. Why? Because the bell rang, she had to get in line or she'd get in trouble
My mom said she'll look tomorrow, but more than likely it'll be vacuumed up. There goes scrapbooking that tooth, huh?
So, we just wrote the tooth fairy a note to tell her where to go to pick up the tooth. I'll have that to scrapbook and the picture she's drawing because she heard that when you draw a good picture you get $5 (it is down to $5 now).
She is worried that the tooth fairy won't come because she won't know the tooth is missing since it's not under her pillow. Thankfully, after explaining, she knows that the tooth fairy hears everyone including the people who speak Chinese.

Not so Shaggy

Sorry, this pic is off my PhotoBooth on my computer - so it's not the best quality, but you can tell that Shaggy cleans up nicely. I swear when I picked him up from the groomers that they had given me the wrong dog.  He is adjusting quite nicely to our home and even starting to cuddle. He seems to have good manners, he dropped a toy when asked to. He is really mild - the yorkie side. But, he doesn't allow Bear, my parents dog, to beat him up. He has a great personality and I love getting to know him more.

pure begging

I need a header for my blog - I know someone out there is dying to make me one. This is me down on my knees begging for a header...

Fibromyalgia

I don't think I've mentioned this here before, so I thought I would let you all know...

some of you know that I was finally officially diagnosed with fibromyalgia about 5 or 6 months ago - I've known for about 2 years. I always thought that everyone felt like their nerves were "on end". Whenever I mentioned it to my dad, (who always understands the feeling of being in constant pain) he sounded like he understood. A while ago he mentioned that he had never had that type of feeling. So, it made me wonder.

Now, I have found a couple new explanations to explain how the nerves being on end feels.  You know how you feel right before you get the flu, how your body just aches?  That's it. Or the feeling of a ponytail headache.  That's it.  Thanks other fibro-friends for giving me those definitions - they are much more understandable than my previous explanation.

I also always wondered why I was so tired, I thought that it was due to the depression, which runs in my family. Again, I ignored symptoms. I knew I wasn't lazy, but just figured I didn't have the gusto to do all those fun things that so many of my friends do. 

I seriously just thought that I was crazy and that the symptoms were in my head and that I somewhere, subconsciously, was just really lazy. Does that make sense?

Well, I was talking to a daughter of a neighbor/friend. I went to a class with her at a women's conference that talked about dealing with depression. So, we started talking about meds and things of that nature. I was mentioning all these weird symptoms and she looked at me and told me that I needed to have my dr check trigger points for fibromyalgia. I went home and did some research of my own - thank you internet and WebMD. I also found a fibromyalgia site. As I started talking to people, I realized that I wasn't alone. There are people out there in this constant pain and it felt good to know that I wasn't alone.

Why am I sharing this now? Well, part to inform people about fibromyalgia, because some don't believe in it. They think it's in our heads. I won't go on about that, but suffice to say that IT IS NOT IN OUR HEADS!!! IT'S NOT JUST IN MY HEAD. 

Another reason is because I wanted to say how grateful I am for friends who are so understanding, even though they may not know what's going on. I'm grateful for friends who don't become bitter because I missed their baby shower (I really, really wanted to go - I'm so sorry Kerst). I'm grateful for friends who understand when I can't commit to anything, because honestly, I don't know how I'm going to feel tomorrow or the next day. I feel bad if I commit to something and then have to say I can't go and end up sleeping all day (which I totally hate - I have so many things I'd rather be doing.)  I'm grateful for family who is understanding and supportive. Who stand by me when they don't understand what's going on. They just know that I don't feel good.  They take Jenna for me when Jason is at school and I'm not feeling well. I am so blessed.

I am also thankful for a doctor and his staff who believe in me when I say that I'm in need of pain medication. They understand the pain and know that I'm not an addict. They understand that just like a diabetic needs their insulin to function normally and survive, there are days that the daily medicines are not enough.  I'm thankful for the new technology that brings daily meds that I have the hope will help me and make me the me I know I am inside. 

Here's a link that kind of gives you more information about Fibromyalgia.

And last but not least, thank you Jason for understanding and letting me sleep. It means the world to me.

por favor

If any of you have a link to my blog from yours and have it linked with my last name, will you please change it to something else? Thanks so much

p.s.  If I don't have you on my links, remind me to to add you...I've lost my mind and don't know what it's going to return (I'm thinking about Christmas break time)

Happy Halloween!!!

Just thought I'd share my pic with you all! Jenna has been trick-or-treating for 3 hours now - she should sleep well tonight. I took her out for a little over an hour and a half, then DH did, and now my sister-in-law aka Hannah Montana has her.  Don't you just love our little Toto?  

In other news, Jenna has her first loose tooth!!! My baby girl says that the tooth fairy will leave her $10 if she draws a picture and leaves it with her tooth. I'd like to know who this tooth fairy is because she must be rich!

I couldn't wait

Yes, I said I was going to wait until Christmas break to get a new dog. And I really was trying to do it, but when Jason came upstairs today with the internet open to a picture of  a dog, I realized I wasn't the only one missing Fez. 

Meet Shaggy. He is a yorkie/shih tzu mix and 4 years old. We got him from a local rescue. He's quite different than Fez, personality wise.  Hopefully he'll open up some when he gets comfortable with us. He rode the whole 1 1/2 hours quietly after we picked him up. I still haven't heard him bark. He hasn't wanted to play with the toys yet. But, he is a wonderful, cuddly dog - just like Fez. 

Hopefully next week we'll get him in to get his hair cut. He's pretty matted. We'll probably keep his hair short if he looks ok. Yes, it defeats the purpose of his name, Shaggy - but Jenna wanted to name him and it wasn't a completely silly name, so we said ok.

And I would be bad if I didn't mention

Jason, you are so wonderful! You put up with me...and I couldn't ask for more!  You put up with the fibro flare ups and all the sleeping I have to do. You put up with my non-house-wife-ed-ness (my own new word). You aren't to manly to do the dishes or the laundry and yet you still take out the garbage every Weds night.

I know we joke that I came to you already broken since I had kidney stones before we were married. But, you still keep me even though I'm broken. 

You did the most wonderful thing for me two days ago, it was small, but means the world to me...you went to Petsmart and bought a small dog tag (shaped as a dog bone) that says "Fez, Fezzie, Fezzie Mutt". And you had it given to me in the most sweetest way possible. I had to hold back my tears when I opened my eyes to see what Jenna had "found under her bed". It is a beautiful reminder and the only piece of anything that I will purposely carry that is the gold color.  (I would take a picture of it, but I can't get the camera to focus)

Did I mention I love you? Can I keep you forever?

The cutest kindergartener

I have neglected in posting any pics of Jenna lately. And I know that all of you cannot get enough of her cuteness...so here is her kindergarten picture. And I know that you aren't going to believe this, but yes, I did her hair. No, aunt Crystal and Grandma Mary were not there when I did her hair, but I did get help from some awesome curlers! They are more comfortable than the foam ones I had in my hair growing up.

Now, Jenna is a very lucky little girl...not only does she have an awesome teacher. Mrs. Thurgood - who also happens to have been my kindergarten teacher! But, she is down the hall from the best school secretary ever. This school secretary gives her a hug everyday, lets Jenna go through her drawers, and gives Jenna just about anything she wants. Who could be this most wonderful secretary? Her Grandma Mary! 

I am so lucky that Jenna gets this opportunity to get even closer to her Grandma Mary. I am also lucky to have Grandma Mary there to watch over my baby - because she is still my baby no matter what she'll tell anyone.

I have also been looking at my pics from when I was that same age and guess what??? Yup, she's definitely my little girl, she looks so much like me when I was her age. Maybe I can get Jason to scan a pic of me from when I was 5 so you can compare.

Lastly, I want to say that I am so lucky to have the best friend in the whole wide world! She texted me earlier this week and said she was kidnapping me on Friday (tomorrow) and to be ready at 6. She's as busy, if not busier, than I am and yet she takes the time to make sure I get out, especially right now with so much going on. I can't even tell you how much that means to me. We are going to scrapbook - which I haven't done forever. Her work is having a crop night and she invited me to come. Did I mention that I'm excited? So, tomorrow I'm going to come home from work, pack up my scrapbook stuff, get Jenna ready for her dance and go scrapbooking. I'm going to sneak out for a few minutes because Jenna is performing at her dance studio's Halloween Carnival (they all are, it's an evil way to get parents to pay $6 for a chili cookoff dinner - you have to in order to get in, she gets in free).  So, I've gotta say...Misty, we take  pics of everything...when we gonna finally get a picture of us together? Just sayin' I keep my camera in my purse, remind me and be prepared and all pertied up for me!  You com-plete me!

I'm sorry to report

that at noon today we had Fez put to sleep. He was showing signs of permanent brain injury and we felt it was the best thing we could possibly do for him.

How much would you pay?

This is Fez. Fez has been our family pet for about 8 years, I think. After we got our house, but before Jenna was born.

I was walking through Petsmart one Saturday that many years ago and there was a male ShihTzu up for adoption. The dog was skin and bones, looked pretty worn for his age. Didn't look like he had been loved. I petted him for a minute and then went back to buy what I came for and left. I told my dad about this dog and he told me to go back and get it. I thought he wanted the dog for him, so I did. I got there and the dog was gone. So, I got the other thing my dad wanted me to get, a dog bed for his dog, and left again. Well, the dog bed I got was the wrong size and so back I went to the pet store. Guess what was back? The grey and white shihtzu. His name was Zack II. I called my dad and told him and he told me to get him. So I did. 

I brought "Zack II" home and found out my dad had got the dog for me. Jason wasn't home, he was out with some friends "jamming".  "Zack" didn't seem an appropriate name for this dog and we started to search our minds for names. For a few days he was called "Flanders", but this name didn't fit and it was hard to yell without laughing. We were watching "That 70s Show" and decided that the name Fez was perfect. So, Fez it was.

Fez had a lot going against him. Like I said, he wasn't much to look at. When we got him he needed a good haircut and actually ran into a chair or table leg and hurt his eye before we could get him to the groomers.  He was also recovering from surgery to remove a herniated umbilical something or other. Half his ear was missing and he had a large scar on his neck. But, he was so lovable.

So, fast forward to a few days ago. For some reason I was thinking about how much I would be willing to pay if something were to happen to Fez. I always thought it odd how people would pay to have an ACL fixed on their dog (yup, you Mindurs - but I still love ya). Or my sister who paid over $700 to find out her dog was really not pregnant, just getting fat.  It was a passing thought, didn't think much of it.

Then, Wednesday I got paged to call the school office. I called and told them I was in the middle of a 5th grade assembly and asked if I could call whoever it was back. They said no, it was an emergency and I needed to come to the office to get the call. As I'm walking up to the office everything horrible is going through my mind. My sister was going to the dr today to find out why she is so sick already (pregnancy), and of course there's always the fear of something going wrong with Alia, and then Jenna or anything else.  I pick up the phone and my dad is crying. I don't see my dad cry often. I think I can count the amount of times I've seen him cry on 1 hand. Each involved a death or extreme family emergency.

He tells me that Fez has been hit by a car and "it's all his fault". He said the vet is busy trying to make him comfortable and that he is breathing, but they are trying to find out more. My dad had taken Fez and his dog, Bear, out for a ride for a while earlier in the day and had just brought him home. He put Fez and Bear in his yard and ran to do a couple errands that would be easier without 2 hyper dogs. We know that Fez can get out of my parent's yard, but he usually doesn't and when he does he just sits in front of their house waiting for them to come home. Well, that day he must've wandered because he was found in front of my parents house. My dad thought he was dead.

Up until today Fez has been in an induced coma, trying to get the swelling in his brain to go down. He would move around weirdly and they were afraid he would damage his spine. Yesterday they started him on a high dose of cortizone and the finished it up last night. Today they turned the morphine drip down by 25% to see how he would react. We should know more by tomorrow. We hope and pray that we will have our Fezzy back, but it's hard to know. We're hoping to see some improvement tomorrow.  I've spent hours at the vet hospital sitting on a rolling stool petting and holding him. Today I even got peed on. (He has no control of his bladder b/c of the coma and he's getting lots of fluid). Fez spent Weds and Thurs night at a wonderful vet tech Christy's home. Tonight is the first night he will have spent alone and it's driving me nuts.

So, the question comes back to...how much would you pay? For the health of a non-human family member? Sure, the amount we've accrued in pet bills so far could pay for 3 new ShihTzu pure breds that are in perfect shape. But none have the half ear and scar on their neck. Each day the vet goes over where we're at on the bill and what we're looking at for care and each day I ask the vet what they think and what would they do if this were their dog. I ask if he's comfortable. Each day I get the somewhat same answer so I continue to accrue this bill. 

I miss hearing his collar (though sometimes I swear I hear it). I miss his sighs and I miss trying to push his body over when he's behind my legs while I'm laying down. I miss him going nuts when someone comes to the door. I even miss having to pick up the torn up tissues and toilet paper after he's gotten into the garbage can. I miss letting him out every morning and watching him shake when Jason goes to put him in bad at night.

If I fall off the blog-o-sphere...

know that I am alive. 

I am undergoing a huge amount of self-inflicted work. Yes, the outcome will be awesome and I am really excited about it...but man, I'm worn out and I still haven't completely started.

Starting next week I will be...

a. mommy to Jenna

b. loving wife to Jason

c. 5th grade school teacher

d. graduate student

e. ESL (English as a Second Language) student

f. and if I have time...myself.

I don't know if it's complete insanity, but I'm excited about my new undertaking of c, d, and e. I was assigned to also be in charge of our school enrichment committee - meaning I was in charge of assemblies, etc - but I talked to the principal and I'm now a member of the committee and not the chair. I didn't think I could give it even close to 100%.

So, starting Monday I will not only be teaching in my own classroom - how cool is it that I'm going to be a teacher? I'm thrilled to meet all my students and to get to know them next week. 

Thankfully Monday is an early out because it is also the first day of school for my university classes. I was only going to take 2 graduate classes, but then I found out I could get my ESL endorsement through the same university and get college credit instead of going through the school district. It'll take longer - an additional 18 credit hours, but it means that I'll get a huge raise and it fit better with my other schedule.

I also have awesome family who is going to help take care of Jenna when Jason and I are in school at night. Also, thankfully I have an awesome guard dog in Fez.

Did I mention that I'm exhausted?